Thursday, 6 September 2012

I wish there was a cure for a broken heart.

Because I need it desperately right now.

This is my first baby, Lola. We found her at a rescue shelter in Milton Keynes in 1999, after the council had picked her up in the city centre, lost and pregnant. No one came to claim her, and after her puppies were weaned, she came home with us. What a gift it was to us, that stupid people let a dog so filled with love go.

When Alex was born in 2000, and Anna in 2004, she became their second mother. To the day before she died, her bedtime routine was always to go in to their bedrooms and check that they were there before she settled herself down in our room.

 It's so raw right now, I can't express fully how much she means to us as part of our family, how much we all love her and will always love her, and how filled with a desperate and terrible grief I am. What I've written isn't good enough, but I'm too lost right now to be able to put any of this into any sort of order.

Lola became ill at the weekend, and passed away on Tuesday, at home with myself and my husband, and our wonderful, kind vet, Mr Richard Jones from the Kingston Veterinary Group. I can't thank him enough for his strength and compassion.

Goodbye my baby, I love you so much.


  1. I am so sorry for your loss xx

  2. Oh Kim, I'm so sad for you right

  3. I'm so, so sorry for your loss. I can see she was a beautiful girl and can only imagine the giant hole in your family right now.

  4. Hello Kim
    So sorry to hear of the loss of your beautiful Little Girl. I know just how you feel and the only way to cope I found was to not concentrate on the sadness but think of all the wonderful happy hours you spent together and the fact that for the 13 years she was in your family she really had the best of times. She has not gone, because she will always be in your hearts.

  5. Oh Kim, so terribly sorry for your heartache right now. Sending you a big hug.

  6. Lovely photo's of a lovely dog.

  7. Oh, my dear friend, I'm sorry I didn't see this post until today. I am so sorry for your loss! I have been through that many times (as a child / young adult) and it never gets easier. I'm glad your vet was able to come to your home. I think that makes it a little less awful somehow.

    My "first baby" (Oliver) is almost 12 years old and I know the day will come when he is no longer with us, but I already can't bear the thought. I am sending you big hugs and lots of love. xoxox

  8. Kim ... I am so sorry ... I have walked in your shoes ... and 5 years has now passed ... she was adopted 3 months before we were married ... and new dogs have since come into our lives ... not one has replaced her ... though all have been equally loved ... I know you have a heavy heart that will get lighter over time.

  9. Hi Kim I have just read this post and am so sorry for your sadness. Our 15 year old minature poodle passed this month. They have sooo much unconditional love and become a big part of our lives.

    Take care