Sunday, 7 October 2012

Stop! Carry on.

 Thank you all for your extremely kind words after my last emotional post, I couldn't reply to most but rest assured, they were greatly appreciated. 
Wow, what a month. We figured out at some point during september that Lola had been with us for 80% of our married lives and a quarter of our lives in total - and for our children, all of their lives. So, the living of a life without her presence has been an adjustment to say the least. Andy and I always nicknamed her ' the furry kid' - (has the furry kid been out for a wee? Did you feed the furry kid? The furry kid's been sick on the bathroom floor, it's your turn to clean it up. You get the picture.) And that really sums up everything about what she was in our lives.
The weekend after she died, we decided to take the children to Sewerby Hall for the day, as it is only about half an hour from where we live, and we really needed to get out of the house. We took these photos there - boy do we all look frazzled. And wow, do I need a hair cut! It was a really lovely and necessary day for all of us (apart from the bit where I cried on a woman on the beach when she asked if we had dogs, but we don't talk about that.)

A couple of weeks after, I received my certificate from MIND (a mental health charity in the UK)to show I had successfully completed Mental Health First Aid with them in June. My professional head clicked in to place, and when I had stopped laughing manically as the irony of the timing, I decided it was time to get it together before I slipped from reactive depression into clinical depression. See? Professional head.
So, it's taken a while, but slowly I have started to feel the need to be creative again. A while ago I bought some oak shott cottons  and they seemed like a good place to start. Ha! Ha ha ha! 

Just so you know, in future this project will be known as the 'what the hell was I thinking?' project. 32 HST's per colour.  32. It may take a while. Which could in itself end up being a massive understatement...

 So, when I got fed up of HST's (and I love love love projects with half square triangles normally) I took a side step with a quilt for my  neighbours who have just had their first baby, a beautiful little girl called Madeleine. I've had this fabric for a while - Children at Play by Sarah Jane - and had seen someone else use it a while ago to make a square motif like the one in this quilt. I'd love to be able to say who it was to give them credit for it, but for the life of me, I can't remember. So, if  you've seen a squared block with HST's around, let me know and I'll give them inspirational credit.

 Now, I need to do some exercise. We're going on holiday very soon and I need to shift all this cake eating weight before we go! Thus the perils of chicken ownership, egg glut + feeling sad = cake baking.

Hope you all are very, very well xxx


  1. So sorry to hear about your loss....I have been away, and just catching up here. It really leaves a hole in your heart and family.
    Glad to see you have found some energy to create again...and I had to laugh at your "what the hell was I thinking" project!! I have a few of those too! Thanks for the chuckle!

  2. So glad your beginning to recover from your loss of the lovely Lola, your day out sounds GREAT! and Yes! cake eating features high on the list of recovery foods in this household too, though sadly we don't have any chickens to help with the eggs.Love HST's too theylook so crisp don't they?
    Keep smilin now you've started to learn how again.

  3. Such beautiful pictures, my friend. I'm glad you're starting to feel better, that inspires me. Continue to be kind to yourself... it's such a long process.

    I think any project with more than 0 (yes, zero) HSTs is insane... you definitely win the "what the hell were you thinking award" for that one :-) --- but it looks beautiful!!

    Hang in there, my friend. And eat cake, LOTS of cake... you'll still look in better shape than most of the tourists here ;-).